Blame it on chick flicks, on reality TV or on retailers, but to me it seems like even women don’t really know what it is that they really want to get from their significant other.
Most V’Day-style guides look like they were made by teenage girls for teenage girls. It’s no surprise that men are totally confused about the idea of a romantic gift and you can even find too many articles written by men that shamelessly list gifts “women love!” like hair straighteners and make-up kits… Love? maybe… Romantic gift? not so much.
So guys, this is what’s wrong with these popular gift ideas and what you should really get instead:
Who doesn’t love chocolate, right? Yes, we’re all guilty, but we (women) also love fish tacos but it doesn’t mean that’s what we secretly wish to get from the man of our dreams (you).
Both chocolate and fish tacos are not a turn on… why? The answer is in “the three S’s of romance”.
The ultimate romantic version of chocolate is… Flowers. Your girl can (and will!) get chocolate for herself any day, but flowers is a totally different story… right? A man who brings flowers today will get some lovin’ tonight ;)
Okay, you already know how I feel about teddy bears as a romantic gift… The ultimate alternative is, of course: Jewelry. Hands down. You’re welcome.
Not sure how to pick? This gifting guide is for you.
She’s out of her favorite perfume and you’re thinking about getting it for her. Yes, it’s a no-brainer and it’s thoughtful, but it’s as romantic as if she were out of her favorite facial mask or dry shampoo or whatever beauty product. Exception to this is if her favorite perfume is super rare to get or has been discontinued and you know she’s been trying to get it. That would instantly promote you to her new superhero of the week (hey, that’s a lot of credit…).
So what about a perfume she never used before? yup, it’s a long shot. It’s hard even for a woman herself to find a scent she both loves and that actually smells good on her, and it wouldn’t be very romantic to have to return your gift or not to use it…
A more casual alternative for a perfume would be a sensual fragrance set of products like body lotion, body scrub, body oil, body mist and the like. You can pick a ready-made gift basket or add couple of products to complement a sexy lingerie piece or a spa-style bath robe.
Opt for the popular scents of roses, lavender, vanilla or patchouli that most women love. My personal favorite is the Vanilla-Grapefruit line by Lavanila. It’s a delicate fruity vanilla flavor that is more sophisticated than the too-sugary classic vanilla.
Unless you’re a professional artist just forget about anything that involves scissors, glue, stickers, glitter and anything that sounds like an artsy-craftsy girly project. Seriously, your grown up woman doesn’t want to receive a handmade pink “I love you” heart shaped box… don’t fall for it. If you feel like being creative do it in the kitchen! Now that’s a hot picture… A man who can cook is the real deal.
Her initials on a key-chain, your Facebook profile picture on a pillow case, an “I love you forever and ever and always” coffee mug with her pup’s picture on it… get the picture? Yes, very high school. She already has 3 “I love you forever and always” coffee mugs from her high school Valentines. She’s all grown up now and you don’t belong to that club either.
A more sophisticated version would be a gold bracelet or necklace featuring her scripted name or initials. Opt for a delicate, classic style that never goes out of style.
Writing a Poem
Most guys can barely express their feelings freestyle let alone doing it effortlessly and gracefully in a creative way. Attempting to rhyme, to use cheesy phrases that (you think) “chicks like” and to use an overall style that you wouldn’t naturally use, just comes off as fake and immature. A good indicator for cheap words you should not share with anybody is if you feel too uncomfortable reading it to yourself…
Always go for words that come straight from your heart, this is the real and only thing she wants to hear from you. Your own feelings in your own words. And it better be written on a pretty looking card rather than on a napkin or a post-it (the latter is actually great for the more casual daily flirts).
Bottom line? Whenever you feel unsure whether a gift or a gesture is romantic or not, remember this rule of thumb:
A boy brings a teddy bear and a box of Hershey’s.
A man brings flowers and a box of Tiffany’s.