I know what you guys are thinking about Valentine’s Day: do women really feel that an yearly pink-fest of heart-shaped kittens and fluffy bears holding an ‘I heart you’ sign made of cheap chocolate means anything? is that what women really want?
Am I right?
So the answer to both questions is: No. That’s why I feel like Valentine’s Day, at least in the way it’s typically advertised, gives Romance a bad name:
Valentine’s Day is only one day long
Romance is a marathon not a sprint. It’s not enough to be romantic one day of the year.
The same way you can’t fuel your car once a year and expect it to run smoothly, you can’t fuel your relationship with romance once a year and expect it to run smoothly… Keeping the romance in the relationship is something that should happen all year long, 365.
If anything, we can treat Valentine’s Day as the New Year’s Eve of our romantic calendar, as a day to reflect on our past year’s love life and to create new year’s resolution for our relationship.
We can resolve to have more quality time as a couple this year, to set a weekly date night or to surprise our partners with a nice gesture more often… whatever our relationship is missing.
Valentines’ Day creates misconceptions
With all the sugary school girls’ merchandise and external cliches it’s no surprise that many men (and women) find this day painfully tacky… They connect THAT with romance and don’t feel like being romantic, ever.
I often hear men say things like “I don’t like celebrating Valentine’s Day” or “my wife hates Valentine’s Day”. I don’t blame them.
Even worse is that it educates generations of teenage girls to believe that this is what adult romance looks like, and every year you see too many women in their 30’s that expect a teddy bear and a heart shaped box of Hershey’s and truly believe that’s normal…
Bottom line? In preparation for the big V-Day, just follow your heart and skip the cheese… get a real gift that is actually romantic and plan a real, normal romantic date. That’s what she really wants.